Halloween Costume Dos and Don'ts 2008

By on Oct 29, 2008 in Daily Distractions, Lists, Movies, Music, Television | 8 Comments

Don’t You Dare:

Juno – You think it will be so cute to go as the hoodie-wearing, quip-spewing pregnant teen and her dorky boyfriend in the calculated dorky retro gym outfit, right? So does every other couple on the planet. Avoid the urge.

Sarah Palin - Sarah the Hunter, Sarah the Pageant Contestant, Sarah the Porn Star, all lame… very, very lame. You’ll be swimming in a sea of Palins. Uck.

“Mad Men” character – “Yeah, look at me! I’m smoking… my hair is slicked back… my sweater’s tight… my lips are really red… and I really do work in advertising…” Ugh.  Soap opera + advertising people = insufferable.

Iron Man – Unless you’re under the age of 12 or can actually build a costume that can fly and blow shit up, don’t do it. Very hard to pee, also.

Elisabeth Hasselbeck – This is for your own safety. Someone might punch you… a few times.

The Joker – Inevitably, some joker (literally) will be dressed as the Batman nemesis carrying around some pills… too sad… too soon.

Travis Barker on Fire – Not sure how you’d even pull that off, so don’t. Fake paper flames are so weak.

Joe The Plumb… – Please don’t. He’s already forgotten.

Please Do:

“Hope” Poster – Support Obama while having fun. Apply “Hope” poster to poster board, cut out head hole, paint your face and hair red, off-white and blue then stick you melon through the hole.

“No Country for Old Men” Guy – Grab a jean jacket, put on a psychotic dead stare and get a wig that resembles the sweet long locks Javier Bardem sports in the film. Quietly threaten people all night long.

Brooke Hogan – Big guys only.

The Jonas Brothers - Petite ladies only.

David Duchovny - Easy one fellas: Dress like Mulder, look sullen and fashion a large erection in your pants. Hit on everyone.

Charlie Manuel – Everyone’s love the Phillie’s skipper! Just place a teeny-tiny Phillies cap (maybe, the ice cream cup version) on top of your large head of whitened hair (baby powder), jam a couple pillows in gut area of a tight baseball uniform, and insert piece of straw in mouth to hammer home the lovable southern boy motif. Expect lots of hugs.

Raffaello Follieri – Time to bust out your Italian accent and old-timey, striped prison outfit. Hold photo of Anne Hathaway so people get the joke right away.

“The Love Guru” -  Absolutely no one saw the movie, but don’t let that stop you. Bonus: you can revive your awesome Austin Powers accent too! Like I said, no one saw it and will know the difference.

Miley and Billy Ray - Make sure to maximize creep factor by sucking face the entire time at party.

Hans and Franz – This oldie-but-never-a-goodie is back! It’s so lame, it’s gotta be funny.

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2009 List: Halloween Costume Dos and Don’ts 2009

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  • Jandek Phil

    Great ideas… I went to the Used Wigs store to get a used Javier Bardem, but you seem to be out. If you get more, can you email me – I’ll pay for overnight shipping.

  • Jandek Phil

    Great ideas… I went to the Used Wigs store to get a used Javier Bardem, but you seem to be out. If you get more, can you email me – I’ll pay for overnight shipping.

  • Jeff Lyons

    Phil, just modify (dye) your old Jennifer Aniston wig from last year and borrow the jeans ensemble from Russ.

  • Jeff Lyons

    Phil, just modify (dye) your old Jennifer Aniston wig from last year and borrow the jeans ensemble from Russ.

  • http://www.whateverblogspot-amy.com/ Amy

    What about Ashley Todd? She’s the McCain voulnteer who claimed to have been mugged by an Obama supporter who scratched a B into her cheek at a Pittsburgh ATM. As it turns out she made the whole thing up.

    I told some friends that I was thinking about being Todd for Halloween and it got some mixed results. Wanted to see what the readers of usedwigs thought.

    It’s a simple costume, make some self inflicted bruises on your face with dark eye shadow and mascara and then make a backwards B on your cheek with red lip liner.

  • http://www.whateverblogspot-amy.com Amy

    What about Ashley Todd? She’s the McCain voulnteer who claimed to have been mugged by an Obama supporter who scratched a B into her cheek at a Pittsburgh ATM. As it turns out she made the whole thing up.

    I told some friends that I was thinking about being Todd for Halloween and it got some mixed results. Wanted to see what the readers of usedwigs thought.

    It’s a simple costume, make some self inflicted bruises on your face with dark eye shadow and mascara and then make a backwards B on your cheek with red lip liner.

  • http://periltd.com/2008/10/23/psychological-support-tips-for-get-and-stay-off-cigarettes/ Laurel Friends

    Have fun getting dressed up in a sexy adult Halloween costume in your favorite fairy tale theme. Laurel Friends

  • http://periltd.com/2008/10/23/psychological-support-tips-for-get-and-stay-off-cigarettes/ Laurel Friends

    Have fun getting dressed up in a sexy adult Halloween costume in your favorite fairy tale theme. Laurel Friends