Photos: Lindsay McIntire

Team UsedWigs, Inc. pulled off our first “live” show this past Friday night and it was a ton o’ fun. Critics raved, “They sure drink a lot, especially in a coffee house.” and “The seats were very comfortable.”

Russ, Todd and I have been doing our podcast for over four years and thought it would be a grand idea to get the hell out of Russ’s home studio for once and enjoy some humanity, interactivity and the deafening thunder of applause and fanatical adulation (we got 2 out of 3, not bad).

We chose MilkBoy Coffee in Ardmore as the venue because Russ and Todd have performed there many times (think Cirque du Soleil on a larger scale) and the owners Jamie and Tommy are great guys who are always up for something different, like a live podcast.

We had a little over a month to organize the show, which was pretty tight considering all we wanted to do: live musical performance, comedian, special guest interview, live science demonstration and some multimedia presentations all jammed packed in a 2-hour show. We envisioned an old-school Mike Douglas Show vibe. After the 3 of us conferred at a kick0ff meeting (McMenamin’s Tavern), we decided we needed some serious help. So we brought in some pros… the After School Specialists.

We enlisted the human firecracker, Kenjamin Franklin Ryzner, to create and serve up the multimedia and Machiavellian martinet, Jandek Phil Charron, to direct the whole shebang (neither asked for money up front, just a piece of the international distribution rights of the DVD and the Spanish language version). Our lovely announcer Lisa signed on too (lucky for us, Lisa and Russ are married, so she could not fib and say she was busy).

That’s a pretty solid crew to stage a performance, but every good talk show needs a house band, so Russ got on the horn and “Rusty Static and The Wig Tones” were born. Part of putting a show together is getting your talented friends involved, and lucky for us, Russell Gellman and Brian Jacobs are two of best musicians and nicest guys around (and are usually up for partaking in our nonsense).

There were rumors the Ultimate Washington Insider was going to be in town and join the show too… his legions of fans were lighting up the message boards and fan sites.

So we got the team together and then assembled a stellar line-up of super fun guests:

• live music by Philadelphia’s Audible
• literary musings by “Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook” bestselling author Josh Piven
• knee-slapping humor from comedian Don Weir
• thrilling science demonstration by PuttyWorld’s Crazy Aaron
• Philly art give-away by Michele Melcher
  

Another excuse to drink planning meeting took place (Earth Bread + Brewer) and we nailed down each show segment to specific time and doled out the duties. Everything went along swimmingly until the day before the show when the schedule band Audible (new CD is outstanding!) had to pull out due to a medical emergency. Uh oh! We’re screwed. “Can anyone do magic tricks for 25 minutes?”

I mentioned earlier about getting friends to help out, yeah, well this is one of those times when you find out just what great friends you have. I’ve been a huge fan and friends with the Philly band The Grundles for many years, so I contacted Tom Jadico (bass and surfboard) about our dilemma and he quickly got on the Grundle Hotline. Less than two hours later, Grundles Ted, Andrew and Tommy agreed to play the show. How cool is that? Very very cool, indeed. Fonzie-freaking cool.

It’s 7:00pm on June 12 and a growing crowd at Milkboy assembles while Kenjamin Franklin’s dynamic video presentation of magic, spandex and teen drinking explodes on screen. Everyone’s in a fine mood. Beers are cracked. Lattes are sipped. Cheeks are kissed. Then 8:15pm hits! Director Charron barks out orders, Ken fires up the video introduction, Lisa takes the stage for the announcing duties, The Wig Tones grab their instruments, and after 40 glasses of water (just a little dry mouth) me and the boys take the stage. Shenanigans, awkward pauses and paper shuffling ensue!

It went pretty darn well from then on. We popped some beers, chatted a bit, gave away a UsedWigs Live Swag Bag to a lucky audience member and then treated the crowd to a PowerPoint presentation on Facebook detailing “how old people (like us) have ruined it!”

At the beginning of this segment we were surprised by a cleverly-disguised SM Shrake playing maracas and wearing a creepy wig. SM, a Facebook etiquette expert, sat down and joined the lively discussion. Segment ended, a new one began.

Bestselling author Josh Piven then joined us on stage for an amusing chat about his “Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook” series and his upcoming book “This Green House” (September 2009). Josh was a funny guy and thankfully, tolerated his hosts who peppered him with barrage of hard-hitting questions. As Josh left the stage, Lisa presented him (and all our guests) with a UsedWigs Live “Home Version” game:

Next up, our pal Michele Melcher gave away one of her lovely illustrations to another lucky audience member while the band set up. The high-energy and charismatic Grundles rocked out as expected. They chatted with us for a bit before leaving to “wing on over to London and jam with the Stones!”

While the rocking may have ended, the rolling continued in fine fashion when comedian Don Weir made a triumphant return to his homeland from Brooklyn, NY. Don killed! 911 received numerous calls immediately after his set about severely strained laughing muscles.

Throughout the night Todd was busy drawing the guests on his trusty pad and displaying the art on a little easel for all to enjoy. The guest was then given his personalized piece of art to take home. Pretty sweet, huh? You would pay damn good money on the Wildwood boardwalk for that honor, but at UW Live… absolutely free! Rusty Static and The Wig Tones kept everything moving and grooving during the show too, creating a chill vibe to temper some of the between segment nuttiness.

UsedWigs Live inaugural show sadly had to end (a senior citizen puppet show was scheduled for 11:00pm sharp), but not before Crazy Aaron pounced on stage and administered some serious pickle electrocutions (not a euphemism) with some old-timey contraption, dazzling and endangering the excited audience who were clamoring for more pickled-fried goodness. It was a sizzling good ending to a fun-filled night.

Many thanks to the above-mentioned UsedWigs Team members; the wonderful guests; the awesome staff at Milkboy who were insanely accommodating; the many fine folks who helped us promote that crap out of the show (Chris and McG at PhillyBurbs.com, Eric at Geekadelphia.com, Dave at ComicVsAudience.com and Jon Solomon of WPRB); photographer extraordinaire Lindsay McIntire, artist Bevan McShea; Aaron and Elizabeth at PuttyWorld; wives Heather and Kelly; and of course, all you good people who came out and showed us a lot of love. As Hammer would say, “Proper!”

Enjoy some More Photos!

• Photo Slideshow
• Photos with Thumbnails
• iPhone Pix of UsedWigs Live

hugs! Jeff

Oh, and many thanks to McCloskey’s Bar (next to Milkboy) for the after party! My booming hangover was well worth it.

Mad Props: The venerable Mad magazine gives us: The First 100 Minutes of the Obama Presidency [via laughingsquid]

It’s Electric! Our pals at Geekadelphia are throwing a shindig honoring America’s greatest geek Ben Franklin. Yup, that long-haired, fat bastard invented a ton of stuff (or so they say) and he’s arisen from the dead and looking for some fun in Philly. Bonus: You know that guy who plays Ben at all the big events? Yeah, well he’s not invited (he’s a real cockblock). Details:

Ben Franklin’s B’Day @ National Mechanics – January 17th, 2009: Drink Specials @ 9PM

National Mechanics
22 South 3rd Street, Philadelphia, PA‎
(215) 701-4883
www.nationalmechanics.com

Christ Almighty, More Ring Tones: When I want the latest in music news, I always hit up the Wall Street Jour… wha? Anyway, good read: How the Music Industry Can Get Digital Satisfaction.

Conan Go Bye Bye: Our Favorite freckled giant is leaving NYC for L.A. soon (boo!), get tickets now to his last shows:

After 16 seasons on the air, the curtain is coming down on Late Night with Conan O’Brien as Conan prepares to head out to L.A. to take over The Tonight Show. Would you like to be a member of one of Conan’s last studio audiences in New York? Here’s your chance!

For an opportunity to obtain FREE tickets, please e-mail your Name, Address, Phone Number, & E-mail Address to: conangobyebye@nbc.com

Old News: Actor Eric Christian Olsen is 31 and looks it, but that didn’t stop him from playing a high school jock in the upcoming awful movie “Fired Up!” Let’s add him to the list: Old School! Too Old to Play Teens

Ale Yay!: Philly Beer Week Just added 20 more events to the calendar – Standard Tap, Good Dog, Grey Lodge, P.O.P.E, 12 Steps Down & TJ’s Everyday. Brewers include: Dock Street Brewing Company, Dogfish Head Brewery, Flying Fish Brewing Company, Troegs Brewing Company, Victory Brewing Company, Yards Brewing Company and many more of your favorite beer slingers. March 6-15th. Stay informed: join mailing list or Twitter.

Jon Wurster = a relentless volcanic eruption of comedy and music!

Language, Please! Kathy Griffin started it, and hopefully Tina Fey has ended it. Let’s put “Suck it!” on that high shelf where we completely forget about things, it’ll fit in nicely with “Bitch!” and some other never-funnies that can be heard regularly in Manayunk bars and also as a greeting on the Preston & Steve morning zoo.

Comic vs Audience, Now with 100% More Sound: I just spent a delightful half hour listening to local comedian Chip Chantry chat with host Dave Walk. You can too! Totally free. Listen up: Podcast.

More Props: Music maven @largeheartedboy reminded the twitterverse that Propagandhi finished their latest in November and should be available soon. We’ll keep ya posted. That is rockin’ good news. In honor, let’s fire up some some ferocity… a nice Bush send-off.

Download MP3: Die Jugend Marschiert

Crack a Book: No argument, this is definitely the best book of the year… that I wrote (you’ll laugh, you’ll cry, you’ll spend a measly $12). Need more? The Grouchy Grammarian and The Dord, the Diglot, and an Avocado or Two make for splendid reading if you appreciate the beauty of our language and the constant punishment it takes. For novels, non-fiction and the like, don’t ask me, check here: flashlight worthy books. Remember kids, Reading is Fundamental.

Write a Novel… for a Cell Phone… for dumb Japanese people.

Search Twitter: And Twitter only: twitority.com. (FYI, we cure cancer on Twitter, follow us)

Ponder The Celebrity of Kate Hudson: And other grim people and things that force you to watch YouTube and cooking shows instead of going out to the movies: Cinematical’s 25 Lamest of 2008!

Investigate Alternative Fuels: Beverly Hills Plastic Surgeon Uses Liposuctioned Fat As Fuel For Car [via Neatorama]. “Hey Craig, your car smells like ass, I’m not kidding, real human ass.”

Fight Crime in a Homemade Costume: If your town is besieged by evil-doers, the World Superhero Registry seems like a good place to look for help or a good laugh. [via MetaFilter]. By the by, I’m currently reading and loving Watchmen. Yes nerdly, I’m jumping on the bandwagon because the new film looks awesome. I’m a graphic novel poseur, I know, I know…

Laugh Heartily: The kids over at Comicvsaudience.com and the Philly Improv Theater are starting off the new year with a stand-up comedy show featuring Mary Radzinski, Joey Dougherty, Sidney Gantt and 2008 Philly’s Phunniest Person Kent Haine. Monday, January 5th, 2009 at the Shubin Theatre (407 Bainbridge St.). Only $5. Directions and Tix. BYOB.

Continue Laughing: The best comedy albums of 2008

Spoil Holiday Movies: Hitler Lives, Dog Dies.

Sorry Ladies, This Hunk is Taken: Inventor Le Trung has made himself a robotic wife and it looks like he plans to have sex with it. Way to go Trung! Thanks for smashing to bits all those creepy Japanese scientist stereotypes.  His next invention: a high-powered robotic douche. [via Gizmodo]

Man, I Love That Cars Song: Funny website Comic vs. Audience deliciously breaks down a local Philly TV spot:  Steak ‘Em Up.

More Gifts for Lazy People: “Ya know, I’m a bit winded after making that paper airplane, I’m just gonna put it down here and take a nappy… (yawn)… if there was only some sort of contraption that would throw it for me…”

Zach Galifianakis to Star in Talking Guinea Pig Movie: When I am not listening to the almighty WOXY, I am listening to The Best Show on WFMU with Tom Scharpling. This past week he chatted with comedian Zach Galifianakis for a couple hours. It ruled. Listen up here.

Thanks for The Hair Hat, It’s Perfect, Exactly What I Wanted: Enough Good Gift Ideas, here’s a less-good, low-rent gift that you should only give to your annoying bald friends : Flair Hair.

No Nukes! Okay, Lots of Nukes! Just a little FYI to China if they start feeling their oats… (NSFW musical accompaniment)

“More than ten years after the end of the Cold War, the U.S. maintains 10,000 warheads and nuclear issues dominate international relations. These photographs reveal the missiles, warheads, bombers, submarines, and command centers that make up the United States’ far-flung nuclear infrastructure.”

Hey Kids, Don’t Go the Porn Route Just Yet: YouTube Videos Pull In Real Money.

The 10 Worst Predictions for 2008: Oops!

New Morrissey: Here’s (<<<) the Album art for “Years of Refusal” (2009). Love it.

GymBook: Based on the majority of my “friends” status updates, Facebook is just a public diary to let the world know if he/she went to the gym or not (feeling soooo lazy today!). And if he/she did go, then it’s also a wonderful  place to list his/her detailed workouts. This should stop now, right now, or I will start describing my bathroom visits. In detail.

Philly Comic Book Nerds, Enjoy: Here’s a very cool Charles Burns Video Interview. [via Philebrity]

Follow Us: Waste more time with us in small 140-character chunks on the Twitter (before it blows up): twitter.com/usedwigs

Holiday Cheer from Nirvana and RuPaul: The kids at Videogum dug up this old awkward and slightly sad gem: