She carves out the “lid” with its pumpkin seeds dangling in their stringy orange viscous pumpkin matter. Holding the lid by its stem handle, she begins rubbing those pumpkin guts all over my face and neck with brisk circular motions, and I feel sleepy and contented.

DON’T YOU DARE!
PLEASE DO!

“Wolverine” – There’s nothing sadder at a party than watching a flabby guy in a white tank top with long scraggly sideburns and chopsticks taped to his knuckles trying to make time with the ladies.

“Teen Wolf Too” – Chicks love wolves, that’s a cold hard fact, but some like a little sensitivity [...]

On one memorable Halloween when I was little, my mom forgot to make us costumes so my dad picked up a couple prepackaged gems from our local drugstore on his way home from work. A tremendous amount of thought was not put into the purchase.

Don’t You Dare:

Juno – You think it will be so cute to go as the hoodie-wearing, quip-spewing pregnant teen and her dorky boyfriend in the calculated dorky retro gym outfit, right? So does every other couple on the planet. Avoid the urge.

Sarah Palin – Sarah the Hunter, Sarah the Pageant Contestant, Sarah the Porn Star, [...]

Holy Sexy Mustard! Halloween is just around the corner ladies, so let’s be a something a little different this year. This gent has some wonderful ideas. Beware, langauge is a little salty. {thanks to Michele for this sexiness}