Useful Noncommittal Responses
By Jeff on Nov 25, 2007 in Daily Distractions, Lists, Office Humor | View Comments
Why offend when confronted with people's questionable taste? Just answer politely with the following meaningless responses.
Situation: A coworker goes on and on about a lame place they visited.
Response: "I can totally see you having fun there."
Situation: A friend tells you about a horrible band he just loves.
Response: "I hear they have many fans."
Situation: You are served horrible food at a friend's house.
Response: "I can tell this is homemade."
Situation: Someone gushes about a lame TV show or movie.
Response: "That's so right up your alley."
Situation: A woman friend asks your opinion on her god-awful outfit.
Response: "I bet you'll get a lot of wear out of that."
Situation: The viewing of a less than attractive newborn.
Response: "Wow, what a baby!"
Situation: A buddy asks what you think about his new ugly girlfriend.
Response: "Dude, she seems really into you."
Situation: A gal pal asks what you think about her new ugly boyfriend.
Response: "He seems like the type that won't cheat."
Situation: You discover your boyfriend is small in the pants.
Response: "It's the perfect size."
Situation: A good friend shows you his cheesy website.
Response: "I don't know which animation to look at first!"
Situation: A guy at a party boasts about his boring job.
Response: "Holy cow, I could never do what you do!"
Situation: A friend gabs about her upcoming wedding for months on end.
Response: "I cannot wait 'til you get married. We're all counting the days."
Situation: An acquaintance asks what you think about her new hair style.
Response: "You know, not everyone can pull that off."
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This is my favorite thing you’ve ever written, bar none.
Scott | Oct 25, 2007 | Reply
Except you didn’t really write this, did you Jeff?
Gary | Oct 28, 2007 | Reply
gary,
yes, I did write these, they originally appeared on UsedWigs about two years ago. I just updated our site (new platform) and I am re-posting our older content. Lots more dated content coming soon!
Jeff Lyons | Oct 28, 2007 | Reply
I do believe Gary got owned?
Shane | Oct 29, 2007 | Reply
Oh yes, he did indeed. He did indeed.
Shaner | Nov 3, 2007 | Reply
One of the best lists of the year! Lovin’ it.
Ivana | Dec 5, 2007 | Reply
that was insanely funny
Frank | Dec 17, 2007 | Reply
Wow! I can totally see you guys writing a list like this!!
rawbacon | Aug 17, 2008 | Reply
thanks mr. bacon! Hey, wait a minute…. ahh touché.
Jeff Lyons | Aug 17, 2008 | Reply
Situation: You discover your boyfriend is small in the pants.
Response: “Well, at least it won’t bump into my Cervix.”
that’s better.
Coocoocachoo | Aug 7, 2009 | Reply
These responses are terribly transparent. Any one with half a brain would see through these. A bold face lie would be better.
Gary Again | Aug 8, 2009 | Reply
“..got owned”, so “lame”..
billybob | Oct 17, 2009 | Reply