McDonald’s Offers New ‘Dime Menu’

Looking to offer something new and exciting to its ever-growing customer base and to get a leg up on the heated competition, McDonald’s announced today it is now offering a new “Dime Menu” at all of its restaurants around the country. Everything on this extensive menu will be value-priced at ten cents.

“We tried the Dollar Menu thing, and it worked well,” said McDonaldland national spokesman Chuck Lartasse. “But what about those who have less than a dollar to spend on food? Huh? That’s where this brilliant, new offering comes in. If you have one thin dime, one-tenth of a buck, well partner, we got some truly tasty food for you!”

Here’s a sneak peek at some new offerings on the budget-friendly menu:

The “Shake Shot” – Enjoy two ounces of your favorite creamy McDonald’s Milkshake (strawberry only) served in a paper shot glass.

The One-Piece Chicken McNugget – Gobble up one hearty piece of crispy chicken (sauce is extra).

The Lil’ Mac – Enjoy this fun-sized sandwich jam-packed with pickles, ketchup, salt, and pepper served on a seedless bun (sesame seeds are extra).

Three French Fries – Have one golden delicious fry now, save two for later, or share with friends!

Filet-O-Goldfish – Marinated in water… so moist!

Hot Fudge Sundae Cherry – Why waste your time with the whole sundae when the delectable cherry is the only thing you really want? Mmmm… McFruity!

Nothin’ McMuffin – This is the perfect morning meal for those who want a quick, easy breakfast. Savor the top half of a tasty bite-sized English muffin (nooks included, crannies extra).

Lite Salad – Extra-large lettuce leaf sprinkled with water and a single soy crouton. Served with a side of air.

Fancy Ketchup Combo – Slather on the good stuff! Get two (that’s right two!) packets of this delish popular tomato-based condiment.

The McBite – For just a dime, our valued customers can take one large bite of any regular sandwich on our entire menu. Chomp away (once) and enjoy the mouth-watering goodness of a Big Mac, a Quarter Pounder, or any hot and yummy sandwich you please! (Please note, overly large-sized mouths will be charged extra).

Honey Mustard Snack Wrap – No chicken, just everyone’s favorite condiment slathered on a wrap.

Bacon, Egg & Cheese McLittle McGriddle – It takes longer to say than eat! Better grab three!

Sixteenth Pounder without Cheese – Our answer to the popular “Slider,” only a fourth of the size for easier sliding!

{From the UsedWigs Archives, originally posted May 2004.}

Jeff Lyons
Health Reporter